The Day After

Relief….that was the expression that most of the guests of the now infamous black and white ball had on their faces as they filed down to the rescue boats. Pure unadulterated relief…..relief that it was time to leave, relief that they survived, but mostly relief that this nightmare was over, but on the faces of a few of those guests was sadness….sadness that tonight they had lost one of their own…tonight they had witnessed the end of a life, to be more accurate they had witnessed the end of two lives…one loved by many, one tolerated by a few. Looking around you could see tears streaming down the faces of the woman whose friend had just died and the men they were with consoling them…..there was no talking as her body was brought out of the mansion and down to the boat so that she could go home to her family. All eyes on those following the body down to the water…there were more people with her than with the other body that had been brought down and taken to the mainland a few moments before.

They sat quietly as they joined their friend on her last journey across the water. They silently consoled each other as they tried to comprehend that their friend was truly gone. No words were needed; just their presence amongst each other was all that was required. Liz sat with her face buried in Jason’s chest while she gripped her friends cold hand, Lulu sat wrapped in Logan’s arms as she cried for her brothers lost love, Sam held Lucky’s hand as he gripped his brother tightly…and Robin sat with Jax’s arm around her shoulder as Carly sat on her husbands other side watching quietly while her husband consoled a friend….and for once Carly honestly had nothing to say to Robin….for once Carly realized that Jax was a loyal friend and on this ride over to the mainland Robin needed Jax’s strength as she had no one else to lean on…no tonight the man that Robin needed and wanted to console her had gone in the boat before her, he’d accompanied the body of his date, who had saved their lives by taking a bullet herself.


Once on the mainland Jax quietly handed Robin over to her uncle, who wrapped her tightly in his embrace before placing her in an ambulance and insisting that she be taken to GH to be checked out. Not having the energy to argue she allowed herself to be taken to GH. An hour later she walked out of the examining room after being cleared by the doctor on duty in the ER, she went straight to the locker room to put on a pair of scrubs, desperately wanting to get out of the dress that she had carefully picked out for her friends party. She tossed the dress into her locker not caring that it fell to the floor in a ball. She then shut her locker and decided it was time to go home. Stepping out of the locker room and walking towards the elevator she suddenly turned and caught a glimpse of the man she would love for all time sitting on the couch in the waiting room. Deciding that she needed to talk to him about what had happened with the woman he was becoming involved with she walked slowly towards him. Without a word she sat down next to him. She didn’t know what to say but she hoped her presence helped.

Tonight they had spoken from their hearts and both admitted that they still loved each other, but neither was willing to give in or to figure out how to make a compromise in order to make it work for them….so they agreed to go their separate ways with the knowledge that they were both still as much in love with each other as they had been the day they broke up. However after finding out Emily had died, Robin was starting to wonder if it was all worth it. Was it worth her having a child if it meant that she couldn’t have the man she loved…was it worth her losing the man she loved, to have a child by a man she didn’t know? Those were the questions running through her head, but the answer still remained the same, she wanted both. She wanted the child and she wanted Patrick, and right now she was choosing the one that she wanted more, she wanted to be a mother. She had told Patrick that this experience had proven to her that life was precious and you don’t know how much time you have so she wanted to fulfill the dream she’d had since before she contracted a disease that would make her life shorter than normally predicted.

He felt her beside him and wondered if she was going to speak. He noticed that like himself she changed into scrubs…he’d done it as a way to get out of the close that were covered in Leyla and Ric’s blood. Reminders that he saved one but not the other, not that he hadn’t tried to save them both, but he hadn’t been as lucky with Leyla as he had with Ric. Part of him felt guilty knowing that if he hadn’t insisted on her going, Leyla wouldn’t have been at the ball or in harms way, but he knew that it wasn’t his fault it was Anthony Zachara’s fault, and it was Leyla’s own fault for jumping in front of the gun…hell after what she’d said to Robin, he honestly thought she’d done it as a way to endear herself to him, but while Patrick was glad he was alive and not hurt his only thought had been to protect Robin. He would always be glad that Robin was ok. Sighing he realized it wasn’t normal to have these kind of thoughts about someone that just gave their life for you, but he couldn’t help it…all he could think about was how happy he was that Robin was alright….though he knew that she wasn’t really alright…not tonight she was mourning the loss of her friend. Without even thinking about it he reached out and grabbed her hand in his. He interlaced their fingers and rested them on his thigh.

Without looking at her he remembered how he’d told her tonight that he still loved her and he’d meant it. He’d even meant it when he’d told her that they shouldn’t waste this time by not being together…….but she was right he hadn’t changed his mind about not wanting children and that would always be the one thing that would keep them apart.

“I’m sorry.” She whispered softly. “I know that you and Leyla were close.”

“Not really.” He told her gripping her hand tighter.

“Patrick.” She said quietly. “It’s ok to admit that you were moving on with her. I am ok with it.”

“I know, but I wasn’t.” He told her. “I was just going through the motions wanting you to think I had moved on, but I wasn’t lying tonight when I said I still loved you and that I want us to try again. But that is neither here nor there, and it’s a discussion we can have later.” He said finally looking at her. “I’m sorry about Emily.”

“Thank you.” She said as a tear slipped down her cheek at the mention of her friend. “I can’t believe she’s gone. It all just seems so surreal.”

“I know.” He told her. “This whole night has seemed like one big nightmare. How was Nikolas when you last saw him?”
“Not good.” Robin told him as she wiped her eyes. “I don’t think it’s fully hit him yet and he’s in for a very tough road ahead of him.”

“Yes but he has really great friends to get him through it.” He told her

“I know.” She said rubbing her thumb against his hand. “And so do you. I mean to help you through Leyla’s death.” She said once again trying to be there for him.

“I’m fine Robin.” He told her. “I mean yes she was my date, and yes I was stupid and slept with her, but other than that she really was only my friend.” He told her.

“It’s ok to grieve for a friend.” She said.

“Then take your own advice and grieve for Emily.” Patrick told her. “Stop trying not to cry and let yourself….stop trying to take care of me…let me take care of you.”

“Patrick.” She said as more tears started. “It’s not your job anymore, we aren’t together.”

“It will always be my job.” He said as he let go of her hand to pull her into his arms. “Like I said I will never stop loving you which also means that I will never stop trying to take care of you, so for at least tonight let me. Please.”

“Ok.” She said in a small voice as she buried her face against his neck and cried.